Sick Clouds
by Words of Silence
Summary: What in the worlds going on! The Akatsuki members are sick, Pein is being nice, and flaming snot? contains OCs...
1. Prolouge

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto! T.T. Rei, Tei, Anno, and Rimu belong to Lady Lilliana and Astarrel's Get. I own Arizon, Keiko, Matai, Takeshi, Pesuke, Tomi, and Ai. Most of these people will be in later chapters.

* * *

Tei stumbled into the kitchen of the Akatsuk hideout. She had bags under her eyes, her face was paler than Zetsu's white side. She seemed to be on the verge of passing out.

"Uh, Telaki-san are you all right", Arizon stood up and walked over to feel her forehead. Tei was burning up. She fell into Arizon's arms. "I take that as a no."

The other members of the Akatsuki stared. No one had ever seen Tei like this. Not even when she was overly drunk (well if she wasn't passed out she was more active than usual). To see her so inactive was like seeing Pein-sama without his piercings.

"Hey morons," the s-rank criminals began to stare. Arizon and Leader were the only ones who could call them morons without being blown up, offed, ameritsued, and/or eaten. "You guys gunna sit and stare all day or help me"

Deidara and Kisame lifted Tei from Arizon's arms. Sassori got up and followed, since Ai was gone Sassori was the closest thing to a medical nin they had. Arizon followed, she needed an idea of the disease so she could stay healthy

"That was weird," Rei said after a long silence. Since their rooms were so close together Rei had heard Tei coughing last night, but she figured it was the alcohol.

"Hopefully it's not contagious," Itatchi said.

"Shush Itatchi-san, you might jinx us," Tobi warned.

Sadly, either Tobi was to late with the warning, Itatchi jinxed them, or maybe there was some long and boring explanation that explained everything then could be put into at least five words. Well whatever it was, it caused Leaders seat to be empty at breakfast.


	2. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: the same one from the first chapter. Ya know what, your lucky I'm even putting a second disclaimer, so there.

The kitchen was silent. Usually Pein was the first person at the table. No one had seen him, except for maybe Konan.

"Uh, Konan have you seen Leader-sama?", Hidan asked.

"He's in the quarantine room with Tei" Pesuke answered. He continued eating. Everyone began to stare at Itatchi.

"What," the younger members tried to hold back their laughter because of the egg on his cheek.

"Itatchi-san jinxed us." Tobi said, "First Tei-chan, and now Leader-sama, next thing we know sempai will be sneezing and coughing..."

The other members changed their gaze from Itatchi to Deidara and Kisame. Itatchi did say it could be contagious, and they were the ones who carried Tei... again their gaze shifted, to Arizon.

"What," she wore a mask and gloves, "I disinfect, if I'm sick during Fanime con. one of you will be being fed to Zetsu."

Zetsu licked his lips. Getting Arizon sick would play into his favor.

"Plant don't even think about it..." Everyone turned once again to Deidara and this time Konan. Both of them began coughing.

Matai and Takeshi began to rush Arizon out of the room. No one wanted to be fed to Zetsu and no one wanted to watch that unlucky guy be eaten.

Sassori grabbed Deidara and Konan and "escorted" them to the quarantine room. The quarantine room, was a fancy word for clean prison, it was basically a place where they stick ill people so they can't get anyone else sick. Well it was a bit better than prison, good food and Sassori practically there 24/7 on Leader's order.

Two weeks had passed since Tei first got sick. The only people still standing were Sassori, Arizon, Tobi, Itatchi, Hidan, Zetsu, Rimu, Anno, Tomi, and Takeshi.

Arizon stumbled into the kitchen one morning. She had on her regular Nintendo Pjs on and her hair was unusually down. All the members were staring at her.

"What," she asked as she sat down at her seat. She noticed there was no food and the table wasn't set. She stared at the the men (and boys) looking at her. "where's breakfast?"

"Um...we cant cook," Anno said.

"Oh god you can't be serious!" Arizon shouted, "You guys are S-class criminals and you want a fifteen year old kid to fix your breakfast!"

No one had time to tell Anno to shut up, but they wished they had before Arizon began to rant. At least she began to cook breakfast...

"Tobi scramble eggs! Rimu cut up the melon in the fridge! Itatchi hand me the sausages!"

"Why do I gotta do it," he asked. Wrong choice of words.

Arizon turned to him with her death glare. She performed two hand signs, fear and despair. Itatchi fell to the ground holding his head.

"Kay change of plans Sassori follow the instructions on that box, Anno hand me the sausages."

"See, now you know how to make your own breakfast," Arizon said after 15 minuets. On the table were eggs, waffles, sausages, and melon.

"Sweet, melon" Itatchi said climbing up from the ground. BAM!! Arizon hit him in the back of his head with a frying pan.

"There is no breakfast for those who show defiance," The others began to eat before she began to hit them.

"Sassori, help me with the leftovers." Arizon took the melon and waffles. Sassori grabbed the sausages and eggs. They headed to The Quarantine Room.


	3. Chapter 2

The room was pure white, it was probably for effect. Arizon wore latex gloves and a mask over her face also had an odd material over her cloak. Sassori rolled his eyes, she was taking things to seriously.

"Arizon-chan where's my chocolate," Keiko whined. Arizon sighed chocolate was the Keiko's one true obsession, she had a pair of pajamas that said so (Rei made it for her on Christmas). Keiko looked at her with her bright blue eyes.

"I told you a million times Keiko, chocolate is what weakened your immune system and thats why you got sick." Keiko seemed to be on the verge of tears, "Aw Keiko, um here, waffles..."

She took the food and went to the corner of the room. The others took food too. Rei was the first to finish eating and was sewing (the illness didn't effect her much), Tei and Keiko were lying in the corner talking about random things, Kakuzu and Matai were fighting over the last of the melon, Konan was in the bathroom, and Leader was in his room (There were multiple rooms connected to The Quarantine Room).

They entered Leaders room. He was the only one who didn't come out to eat. They brought him food and took away the old dishes.

"Hello Sassori-san, Arizon-san." Pein-sama smiled. He had been acting weird lately and he was scaring the other members.

"Hello Leader-sama," Arizon taking the old plate away.

"Oh, call me Pein," He said laughing. Sassori backed away from Pein's bed.

"Get better Pein-san," Arizon said with a smile. Sassori took another step closer tho the door. "Lets go Sassori."

"Hey everybody look over here," Arizon said outside of Pein's room. Everyone looked her way, she performed two hand seals and they were out like lights This jutsu was the polar opposite of the one she performed on Itatchi, it made their deepest desires come true.

* * *

A few hours later each of the members were awake and relieved, for Arizon had gone to her room and stopped bossing them around.

"I never realized how mean she can be," Rimu said as the men (and boys) lounged around in the living room.

"Arizon-chan isn't mean, she just get along well with people, " Tobi said. He was playing his Game Boy Advance because Kakuzu said he was too irresponsible to have a DS.

"You guys shouldn't talk behind her back," Takeshi was flipping through the channels on the plasma screen, "If she hears you she'll be pissed."

"Yeah..." Sassori sighed, "She is a member of the Omoisugoshi clan."

"Takeshi is right, you shouldn't talk about people behind their backs, especially when they're standing right behind you," Arizon said from the doorway.

Each member prepared themselves for torture.

"Eh, don't worry about it," she walked over to the Wii, "I finished burning Super Smash Bros. Brawl, so I'm in a good mood."

They began to play for what seemed like hours, well, cause it was. They skipped lunch and went on until eight o'clock when they realized they were hungry.

"What should we eat," Deidara asked looking through the fridge.

"I think we have frozen dinners in the freezer," Itatchi said sitting at the table.

"Then go get them." Arizon was sitting down too.

"How about the two of you stop fighting and get them," Sassori said, "we need eleven."

"Sassori-sempai!" Arizon tried to protest, but the two were pushed out the door by Kisame.

The two never get along. Because they both specialize in genjutsu there was always tension between them. They saw themselves as rivals. For Arizon loosing to Itatchi was like loosing to an idiot which a genius like her couldn't stand. For Itatchi it was loosing to a little girl. Both were the child prodigies of their clans. Both were very similar and they hated it.

"I hate you," Arizon said as they began to look for the frozen dinners.

"I know, I hate you too," Itatchi found the boxes that had the dinners. Each grabbed a box ad headed back to the kitchen.

"Arizon-chan, what leader-sama and the others eat," Tobi asked when they got back.

"Ummm... what we are gunna cook in a few minuets."

"You forgot, didn't you," a smile spread across Itatchi's face.

"Cook those, I need to go check something," she began to run to the stairs that led to all their rooms, "And in my defense I was caught up in Brawl!" she yelled to them. It wasn't a good excuse, but it also wasn't her job to cook for the members.

* * *

"Food... food," Konan began to repeat over and over and over.


	4. Chapter 3

"Where is she," Tomi groaned. He was into the oven waiting for his dinner to finish cooking.

"Who cares, it's not like it's Arizon's job to take care of them," Sasori said angrily.

"Yes it is. Taking care of people is a girl's job."

Sasori moved to punch Tomi, but Deidara beat him to it. "Womanizer! Un!"

"Yeah!" Takeshi shouted, just glad someone hit Tomi, "Stick up for half of your gender!"

"Shut up un!" Deidara shouted fuming.

"Ta-chan, that's rude, Sempai is full woman, not half," Tobi lectured Takeshi.

"I'm a guy un!" Deidara shouted.

"Quiet Deidara, you're giving me a headache," Sasori ordered. Deidara sat down, silently fuming.

Rimu laughed, "You're lucky none of the girls were here, they'd kill you for sure."

"Uh, guys..."

"Shut up Anno." half the kitchen said.

"Yo! The food is burning!" Hidan shouted.

Tomi opened the oven and yanked the frozen dinners out. They were still on fire in the pyro's hands. Takeshi sent a gust of wind at the food putting out the fire.

"Man, these things are black," Hidan said.

"What are was supposed to do with these," Kisame groaned.

"Tobi's hungry!"

"Calm down sensei," Takeshi said shaking his head.

"We can feed the burnt stuff to the diseased," Itachi suggested, "Don't look at me like that."

"Itachi has a point," Sasori said in deep thought, "Their noses are clogged up so they can't taste the food. The only problem is the look of it, but they're probably so hungry that wont matter."

"I vote Tomi and Anno take the food," Kisame said, "All in favor..."

Eight people agreed on the suggestion.

"Hey! Why do we have to go!" Tomi protested.

"Because Anno is annoying and you can stand the heat of the burnt trays."

"That's... Really good reasoning. Especially for you Kisame," Rimu said with a look of fake disbelief. Kisame rolled his eyes.

"'Kay whatever." Tomi balanced two trays on each arm and his head. Anno held a tray in one hand and another tray of drinks in the other.

The people still in the kitchen made sure not to burn the food, 'cause no one was going back into a freezer. One of the reasons no one was willing to go in there was because even in fall the base in Amegakure was colder than one of the coldest days in Konoha. Well, I guess that's not saying much, because Konoha is in the warm fire country. So I guess Kusa is more accurate which is moderately colder than Konoha. Okay, so maybe Otogakure is a better idea of coldness... Okay now shut up! Anyway, you get the point, right?

A loud scream broke through the hideout. Then two loud screams, two loud girly screams. So girly, that it was too girly to belong to any of the girls in the Akatsuki Hideout. The special scream that belongs to the two boys, Tomi and Anno.

"What kind of trouble did those two get into now?" Takeshi groaned.

"Tobi will go see," Tobi stood up, but was pushed back into his chair, "Sasori..."

"I'll go, I'm a puppet. Can't get sick remember." They watched as Sasori left the room.

"You were a good man Sasori," Takeshi said, "A moment of silence for his bravery."

The moment of silence was obviously only honored by the kitchen. Out side of the room screams and shouts and... laughter?

The laughter grew louder and louder. Arizon came though the door, looking like she was about to pass out onto the floor.

"Okay, I don't get it," Rimu, the king of pranks and jokes, finally said.

"Yeah, I give up too." Kisame shouted.

"Yo! Ari! Breath! Un!" Deidara shouted.

"S-s-s-sorry, Deidara. It was just so awesome!" she started laughing again.

"What was?" Hidan asked, now curious.

"The greatest brawl of all time! The Puppet Master and The Girly mes versus The Diseased!"

"What! You were in the hall!?" The crowed of men in the corner of the room looked pretty pathetic.

"I was watching it all from my room." Arizon pulled the dinners out from the oven. The surveillance cameras set up all over the hideout that hooks up all the way to all four of all he computers and her two laptops. It brings a new meaning to 'I'm always watching you."

Sasori pushed open the door a little, "I'm going to disinfect these punks. Arizon, I don't want to find you passed out in front of the computer. Got it." It was a command, not a question.

"Okay mom," Arizon sighed, "They're next you know." the boys looked Arizon curiously, "Tomi and Anno. They're next."

* * *

A/N: Heh, it's been an eternity since I last updated -.-' Oh well... Yeah, so hope you like it! Next chapter will be double long for you people, kay?


	5. Chapter 4

A/N: Hah! My first post of the new year, or well in forever I guess! And it went to the story with the least fans... Hn,I need to think about that one... Happy New Year!

* * *

Hell is one of the many words that could describe the Akatsuki Hideout. Hidan would prefer to use a definition with a multitude of profanities, but because of the rating, I cannot list those.

Arizon was abnormally pissed off. Of course she was always pissed off when Matai, or Keiko wasn't there to calm her down. Also Itachi being around didn't help much either. One would think Arizon's excessive downloading and the load of new video games she was burning would cheer her up more. Sadly, these were grim times in the hideout.

"I'm scared," whimpered Anno.

Why Deidara was trapped in a room once again with the hedgehog was a mystery to the blond, "Shut up Anno."

The door opened. In the doorway was the 'She-devil' as Kisame called her.

Anno let out a yelp and jumped into Deidara's arms. The Deidara pushed him off onto a pile of dolls.

"Why are you guys in Sasori-sensei's closet?" she asked.

"The real question is, why are you in my room!" Deidara shouted.

"Sensei asked me to get Hiruko so he could polish it. Since the two of you share a room I came here... but you're on sensei's side of the room."

Deidara shook. He was caught. If Arizon told Sasori, he was dead meat for sure. "Uh, let's not tell Sasori-Dana about this, 'kay" He tried to sound casual as he pleaded.

"Eh, fine, whatever. You do know that you flung Anno onto Hiruko's tail, right?"

Deidara cursed under his breath. He would need to tell Sasori that Anno was now poisoned because of Pein's 'members shall not kill other members' rule.

"You agreed cause I'd have to tell him, huh." Deidara growled. He flung Anno over his shoulder.

"You shouldn't move him around too much. It'll make the poison spread faster." Arizon, careful to avoid the tail, dragged Hiruko behind her as she followed Deidara.

"Who cares, in five minuets we'll have the cure anyway."

Arizon shook her head. Just because they would have the cure soon was no reason to swing Anno around like a doll. The acid could go too his brain and he would be worse than usual.

The three of them came into the living room. All the 'well' members were there. Even Zetsu had been missing for the last few days. In fact, he was in the center of the room, all eyes on him.

"Good, you guys are here. Have a seat." Zetsu said.

Deidara dropped Anno in the door way and sat on the couch next to Hidan. Arizon left Hiruko by Anno and sat at Sasori's feet, mumbling something about "having to listen to these imbeciles..."

"We can't keep things like this," Zetsu said.

"Like what?" Hidan asked.

"This place is a mess. Leader-sama is going to be pissed when he gets better, so we need to clean. And, face it, without Matai and Keiko, Arizon is going to kill us or we will lose what's left of our sanity."

"Being really blunt today aren't you Zetsu," Arizon grumbled.

"Yes, because this is serious. So, we need to find Ai. Obviously, without her and her hermity medical skills, they wont get better. So I say we should organize a search team to get her."

"And what makes you think you can say that?" Kisame asked.

"Because Leader and Konan are out of commission. And Leader said so himself, that Zetsu and I are in charge when that happens," Sasori stated.

"Oh! Tobi wants to go! Please Zetsu-sempai! Please! Please!"

"Fine Tobi, just shut up."

"Well, that makes three of us. That's good enough." Sasori sighed.

"Three? Sensei, only Zetsu and Tobi said they're going."

"I'm going too Arizon."

The look of shock and horror on the present members' face was priceless. Well, if Kakuzu had a camera (and wasn't hacking up phlegm) he would probably find a price for the picture when he sold it on the Internet. Without Sasori Arizon would be in a worse state and when Hidan pissed her off at five o' clock everyday, she could go haywire and (like Zetsu said) destroy what's left of the member's sanity.

* * *

"Oh yeah and here." Arizon gave a Nintendo DS to Sasori. Sasori, Tobi and Zetsu were standing at the front entrance of the Akatsuki Hideout.

"Ooohhh, Sasori-sempai gets a DS! Kakuzu-sempai, why can't Tobi have one!?" The masked nin whined.

"It's not a DS Tobi," Arizon rolled her eyes, "Well, it was one. I modified it so now it's hooked up to the cameras so sensei can monitor what's going on."

"Arizon, promise me you will behave." Sasori's bored expression was replaced by a stern, serious one.

"Fine, whatever," Sasori's expression didn't change, "I promise! Ok!"

"Good. While I'm gone listen to Leader- shit, he's sick." Sasori thought for a second, "Damn, Matai's sick too. Listen to Deidara."

"What! That's the stupidest thing you've ever said!" she shouted after him as the three ninjas started to leave.

"Have fun Arizon," Sasori shouted, "Listen to Deidara!"

"Go to Hell!"

"I'm already there!"

Their usual banter didn't make Arizon feel any better. She folded her arms and glared at the hideout entrance. She turned around to see Deidara and Itachi.

"Hm, Sasori said you're in charge. So make Omoisugoshi clean up." Itachi said to Deidara.

"What if she tortures me," Deidara mumbled.

"Wow. The bomber thinks," Arizon said just loud enough for him hear.

"You wouldn't dare Omoisugoshi. You're the one who gave Sasori the surveillance system in the first place." Itachi mocked Arizon.

Arizon just glared for a while then stomped off to her room. The sound of the door slamming rang through the hideout.

The day when Arizon cooked breakfast. Sunagakure. Omoisugoshi Compund.

* * *

The five sons of the Omoisugoshi's family's head sat in the living room of their home. The youngest son of the five was writing a medical report. His pencil snapped as a strange feeling ran down his spine. He looked up abruptly from his medical report.

"Brothers. I feel something horrible has happened." He said.

"What Sy? Someone got a horribly infectious disease that you are now at this moment spreading to all of us?" One of the brother's asked.

"No, much worse. Millions of lives could be at stake. I fear that Ari-chan is in a kitchen cooking."

The four of them turned on their youngest brother. Their look of horror spoke for itslef.

"Don't joke like that Syzon," the oldest one said.

"I'm not joking brother." Syzon said very seriously.

"We leave at dawn!" The oldest declared.

* * *

Sad. I guess a lot didn't happen... Oh well!


End file.
